Friday, April 8, 2011


Oh conference weekend! An opportunity to watch church in pj's in the comfort of your own home.... OK. It really it is so much more than that. On Saturday morning, the first session of conference, I was telling Steven how excited I was for this conference weekend because it would be our first one as PARENTS. So that meant that every time that one of the inspired speakers spoke about parents they were talking about US. For some reason it made me super giddy. 
I enjoyed the talks so much and every one of them said something that I needed to hear. I had a couple favorites (how amazing was Elder Scott?) that touched me. 
In the last session of conference Elder Holland gave a remarkable talk. One thing he said that I hope to never forget was, 
"If we teach by the Spirit and you listen by the Spirit, some one of us will touch on your circumstance, sending a personal prophetic epistle just to you."
This sort of gave me a new perspective on conference. As I thought about it I immediately knew which talk was "just to me."  

Becoming a stay at home mom has been a bit of a struggle for me. About a month after Steven and I were married I began working full time. I worked full time until the very day that my Dr. put me on bed rest. Having two incomes was nice. Now that I stay at home we have gone down to one income and it has been a little hard for our little family. Just the typical way to begin a family in the Mormon culture I guess. Start a family and everything will work out (this seriously has been so true). However for some reason I have felt so guilty staying at home, playing with our perfect baby spending all my time with him while Steven goes to work and does things that are much less desirable. At the end of the day we are both tired. Me from swimming in the pool with our baby, cleaning and playing endlessly with little Winston and taking pictures of him like crazy, and Steven is tired from dealing with people, solving ridiculous work related problems, providing financially and fulfilling all of his job requirements. (Please note that my husband has never complained about his job. Providing for us brings him so much satisfaction that he will do whatever he needs to make sure that we are taken care of.)
(I am getting to my point) 
On the Saturday morning session of conference Quentin L. Cook said exactly what I needed to hear...
"These are very emotional, personal decisions, but there are two principles that we should always keep in mind. First, no woman should ever feel the need to apologize or feel that her contribution is less significant because she is devoting her primary efforts to raising and nurturing children. Nothing could be more significant in our Father in Heaven’s plan. Seconed, we should all be careful not to be judgmental or assume that sisters are less valiant if the decision is made to work outside the home. We rarely understand or fully appreciate people’s circumstances. Husbands and wives should prayerfully counsel together, understanding they are accountable to God for their decisions."
This talk was a sign for me to let the guilt go. I am doing exactly what I need to be doing right now (something that Steven has told me time and time again).
I am so thankful that Steven works so hard so that I can stay home with Winston and just focus on being a mom and loving our child. I am also thankful that we made the decision together that I would stay home and help raise our children. 
Someday I will go back to work (if everything that I am working on works out I will be working from home) but until then I LOVE just spending my days as a wife and mother. 


  1. Hi Emily. I've read your blog for a while now but never commented. I found it from Kassi's, I'm not a random creeper :) Anyway, I just wanted to say I totally feel you. I stay at home with our little girl while my husband works 2 jobs to support us. I often feel guilty because I already have my degree and could totally be working to help provide, but we both know this is where I need to be. Funny how that works. But really, you wouldn't want to come home and hear stories from whoever watches Winston about how he rolled over, or cut a tooth, or took his first step. You'll get to experience it yourself! And that is such a blesing! We truly are lucky women :)

    PS that quote from conference really struck me too, about not feeling guilty. We're where we're supposed to be :)

  2. Bless Steven for happily and readily agreeing with you on having you stay at home. Ben and I fought that fight for years and years. I finally won and am a very happy stay-at-home mommy. I missed my first's child's...everything. First roll over, first word, crawling, sitting up... It was awful.