Saturday, January 14, 2012

2012: Confidence.

{This picture has nothing to do with the post.}
Writing this is very difficult for me... But since this is my "journal" I want to document it... even if I do end up deleting it as soon as I post it.
Like almost every other girl I struggle with confidence issues. Daily I beat myself up over this or that. It has gotten to the point that talking to people (in person, on the phone, texting, email...) has become extremely difficult for me. I would love to be able to call up anyone in my family (or just anyone) and just talk without worrying what they are thinking on the other end.
I used to love talking to people...
 Nothing looks good on me, I never say the right thing, everyone judges every thing I do or say... I am kind of just one big walking flaw.
Nothing bugs me more than a girl complains about her confidence issues (or complains period). And here I am doing it. My confidence issues are running my life. And I am kinda super over it. I think Steven is getting sick of me never believing him when he gives me a compliment which is daily... He's a really good man.
This year instead of having tons of little goals I have just one
I don't know exactly how I am going to this. But it will happen. I have let this go on long enough. It's ridiculous.
Two thousand twelve is the year that I learn to love myself!


  1. I believe in you Em! Isn't it pretty sucky that we all have that sort of problem? I feel the same way sometimes... I feel your pain. I know you can do it!! And for the record, you are NOT one big walking flaw. I actually think that's a pretty clever way to describe it. I think you're great, and I really mean it! :)

  2. hey! this is my NYR as well ( how's it working for you? i have to all-the-time remind myself, "STOP THINKING THAT" or "yes, that went terribly wrong. now breathe and do it differently tomorrow or get up and fix it now." stuff like that. i think it's helping so far if i tell myself i'm not allowed to say mean things to myself!

  3. Thank you ladies! It is great to have such wonderful support.

  4. One of things I remember about you the most is that you weren't afraid to be yourself. I lived in Thatcher for a long time where it was more standard to be like everyone else, and you stood out as someone different and I liked that. You were quirky and unexpected and hilarious. It's so hard to be a girl and feel valuable sometimes, and I doubt myself constantly. So know that you're not alone, but also know that you're awesome!